Motivated To Exercise

Haha, Beans. That makes no sense. ???: Says you, you’re lying on the floor! Can you really blame me though? W- wh-wait, who’s spoopin’ me? ???: It’s me, the thing you ate earlier. MUFFIN: The muffin you had for breakfast, remember? *Very gross burp* MUFFIN: L-Look, listen. MUFFIN: You need to scootch your toosh and do some exercise otherwise your body will store most of my carbohydrates as fat. …. Ehhh, I don’t really feeeeel like it. *WHOOSH* *cries like a wimp* Now, before you waste any other brain cells on your next distracti– *Squeak* *squeak* *giggle* *Squeak* *Squeak* *squeak* Aaawwwwwwhhhh *Finger snap* MUFFIN: Go and exercise. MUFFIN: Yeah, come on, keep going! Try one more! // ???: Don’t you quit so soon! MUFFIN: Are you the.. Brain? What are you doing here? BRAIN: Same as you. Encouraging myself to put in 100% effort. Otherwise I’ll feel like I accomplished nothing. MUFFIN: I.. Don’t believe you should think that way. BRAIN: …Yeahhhhh you’re right. *CRASH BANG BOOM POW* *Very nasty coughs* MARPHIC: Two. Remember when planking was a tend? It was stupid! Unfortunately I was a dumb kid and did them all the time on traffic cones. *Panting* I need water. Uh oh. I can’t get up. My abs are broken. But at least the cold floor feels nice.. 🙁 Hey, cardro- hydro- mcthingymuffin? MUFFIN: Yeah, what’s up? Or should I say down? Because that’s where you are, heh-heh. I will eat you. MUFFIN: Well technically you already diiiiii- iiii– what do you need? How many calories did I burn? MUFFIN: Based off the amount of work you exerted in the last half hour after you got your sorry excuse for a sack of sandwiched off the floor, You burned roughlyyy… *Marphic checks nutrition facts on the muffin* 200 calories. F o u r h u n d r e d a n d s i x t y MUFFIN: Uuuuhhhhhh Yup. Well shoot that’s no good. However, for an average person like me that consumes roughly 2500 calories daily, when compared to my fast, young and effective metabolism, my body naturally burns off the majority of these calories by mandatory bodily functions like breathing and keeping my insides working. MUFFIN: Marphic I’m just a muffi- Eating only you, Mister Muffin, Doesn’t have a long term effect on my body. But if I were to say… Eat a dozen of you, then that’s over 5000 calories daily. Assuming I’d only be able to burn half that amount each day, I would have a remainder of 2500 calories adding up every day which could cause me to gain likely a couple of pounds within the end of the week. *Muffin does a thing* Oh poop.


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